Frustration is a natural emotion. Accept it. It is a response to multiple failed attempts to overcome an obstacle or the desire to change something in which you have no control. Through frustration and failure we often learn more lessons about our own character than through success. Persistence and resilience through the struggle will lead to a resolve. The resolve may not always be the outcome you initially desired, but the outcome will provide you with greater strength, intelligence, and endurance for the future. You are a better person because of frustration.
1. Find the Positive
Even if it feels like nothing is working, look closely, there is certain to be something going right. Maybe it is a correct read, or good footwork, or good hand-positioning. It is likely something little, maybe insignificant to you, something that is already a habit, but it is positive. You have now taken yourself out of a negative mindset of “it’s hopeless” and are back focusing on the positive. Build on it.
2. Focus on the Big Picture
Do not let a little frustration prevent you from achieving your ultimate goal. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in one problem and trying to solve it that we forget what we were originally trying to accomplish. Try not to ask yourself, “Why did this happen?” Asking questions like that will keep you rooted in the past. It doesn’t offer a solution to the problem. The important thing is knowing the answer to the following two questions:
• What do you want to happen differently this time?
• What do you need to do in order to get there?
This brings you from a reactive mindset to a proactive mindset. Reactive is living in the past, proactive is living for the future.
3. Block the Noise and Simplify
Noise is the “silent chirping”, the self-talk in your head. Noise is other people’s words and reactions. Remember, frustration is a natural emotion, it is okay to be frustrated! But your response to frustration is vital. The external response is what everyone immediately sees. It is facial expression, a body posture, an “awwww shucks” snap. This immediate reaction is expected, if you didn’t respond, people might not think you care?!?! Most often, an immediate response is not a distraction; allowing a response to linger becomes a distraction. Recognize the linger as noise, block this noise, think: “I AM THE GREATEST”, chuckle inside your head, and live for the future. It’s really that simple.
4. Multiple Solutions
There are always options. You just need to brainstorm and figure them out. Tell yourself you need to come up with 5 possible options to what you will deal with in practice or a match. This requires preparation and for you to look forward. Just knowing that you have lots of options will help to make you feel better. You won’t feel like you are trapped in one situation. From your list, figure out and try different directions (experiment) and go for it. This is how we grow and learn.
5. Just Do It
One of your leaders hit the nail on the head, “Stop talking about it and just do it!”. Take action and keep on trying. Try again and again and again (with those different options you figured out). It may take hundreds or thousands of attempts, so choose to be optimistic with each attempt. When you take action, “Just Do It”, you will beat frustration. The action is the reward.
6. Visualize a Positive Outcome
A lot of times you can get stuck on focusing on what you don’t want to happen or fearing the absolute worst thing that could happen. The top athletes of the world will imagine themselves competing flawlessly over and over again. This is what you need to focus on as well. See yourself achieving your desired outcome. What will it look like? What will it feel like? What will you say? How will you feel? Take the time to visualize it and really feel it. It will inspire you to keep moving forwards.
7. Stay Positive
Things are usually not as bad as they first appear. Sometimes, things seem much worse simply because we’re tired or mentally drained. Taking a break and remembering to keep your sense of humor can also help. This time of frustration will pass. A positive mind is far more open to solutions and answers than a negative one that thinks it’s just “hopeless” and thinks “what’s the use?” A closed mind will not be able to see the possible solutions when they do come along. Stay positive and smile ?